DrRKG on site at the Women’s Conference in Long Beach, California 2010.  Here are highlights with Maria Shriver at the helm of her final Women’s Conference in Long Beach, California. A dazzling event for over 30,000 women and a few men too!

Linda Joy exudes passion, fierce determination and great kindness. She takes pleasure in turning people on to her hard won secrets and strategies. Linda shares her expertise with disarming enthusiasm. “Let me help you.” “You can do this.” “That’s easy. Let me show you.” These are heartfelt expressions that roll off her tongue with ease and authenticity. Linda singlehandedly cultivated a successful life path for herself and her beautiful daughter, refusing to let financial struggles stop her from building the life she envisioned.

Born in Taunton, MA, Linda grew up the oldest of four children and took the reins as caregiver to her younger siblings. She dropped out of high school feeling overwhelmed, confused and probably a little burnt out. Linda knew without a high school degree she would not have the best career opportunities nor would she be able to make the most of her potential. Several years later she summoned the inner strength to get back to school and complete her GED. After that she continued her education by taking college courses whenever she could.

Daughter Niki at 3yrs

Transforming from Welfare Mom to Award Winning Entrepreneur

Linda described herself as “…a single, struggling welfare mom with little to no self-esteem. My daughter was my catalyst for wanting to become not only a great mother but to be the best person I could be.” She entered a state funded job-training program to improve her professional skills. The training program consisted of a group of single moms who could barely afford diapers.

During that time Linda knew that she and these other women needed to look professional if they were to score jobs. She took it upon herself to find a consignment shop and brought some of the women shopping. Linda felt personally encouraged by looking like a businesswoman and at the same time inspired the others. With their new clothes and confidence she and the other women felt like “maybe I can do this, maybe I do deserve a better life.”

Linda then discovered her first mission. She witnessed the transformation of the other welfare moms when they looked and felt good about themselves. Linda knew she had to create a place where women could come and move into their power. Making attractive business attire available to women without jobs or money to spare opened a door of hope for them. As women slipped into their new wardrobes, they emanated strength, pride and hope for something better for themselves and their children. Looking successful was an important first step for many of the women in feeling worthy and actively pursuing their dreams.

May 99 SBA Award Ceremony

Linda’s determination to start her own business remained strong, even though the prospect of failure terrified Linda. She overcame her fear and opened her first consignment business in 1992.  She began her upscale consignment shop with $2500 and a burning desire to affect the lives of other single and struggling moms. “I wanted to create a space that gave every woman who walked in the door an opportunity to provide for themselves and their children with more than just clothing, but a sense of pride and self-esteem.”

Feb 2000 NBC appearance

Linda persevered and her consignment shop flourished. Women came for the clothing and they returned because of Linda’s beautiful and contagious energy. In 1999 Linda won the Small Business Association, Welfare-to-Work Entrepreneur of the Year for the state of Massachusetts. This honor validated her efforts and she began receiving national media attention about her accomplishment. She recalled the thrill of sharing her story about conquering obstacles to achieve her dreams on the NBC talk show, “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus.”

Linda views her life’s challenges as necessary “stepping stones to guide me to who I am and where I am now.”  She knows now that all of her “perceived obstacles” were crucial to prepare her for the multiple roles she assumes today.

Her journey of self-discovery over the past twenty years deepened her sense of self and compassion for others.  She explains, “that women spend so much of their lives looking for external validation and wisdom. ALL they need they already have.  All the wisdom is within. They just need to turn inward and listen.” Linda longed to make an even bigger difference in the lives of women and began writing and creating venues for women to come together.

Inspiring Women through her website and Aspire Magazine

Aspire Oct/Nov 2010

Linda is now an entrepreneur, speaker and publisher. She founded AspireMag.net in 2005, a premiere magazine with the goal of stimulating women to lead more authentic and inspired lives. She encourages women to share their wounds, fears and self-doubt. “I have been where they are and I can offer hope, love and support.” Linda helps women tap into their innate gifts and voices so that they can find balance, discover their own inner passions and deepen their connections with others.”

InspiredLivingPublishing.com, the publishing company Linda founded, provides women with traditional and nontraditional opportunities to publish and share their “wisdom, insight and stories with women around the globe.”  She is drawn to stories of the ‘everyday woman’ who moves through her fears in search of a life of fulfillment and authenticity. All of Linda’s business endeavors revolve around her goal of inspiring women to live more meaningful lives.

She assures women that they can choose to move through their pain and reach a life of joy and passion.  Linda provides women with the inspiration, tools and strategies so that when they are ready to change their lives, they will get the support they need and thrive.

Aspire's Mission to Inspire 100,000 Women

With all of her business ventures and accomplishments, Linda’s most proud accomplishment is raising and participating in the life of her wonderful, compassionate daughter. “She has blessed my life beyond anything I could have ever imagined.” Linda led the way for her daughter through her commitment to being the best she could possibly be and to give back to others whenever possible.

Hoping to empower women, Linda explains that every one of us is here to fulfill a purpose and that our life is a journey bursting with opportunities to discover that purpose. Linda’s works passionately and relentlessly to inspire women to dig deeply and listen to that still voice within their “inner wise-woman” and act accordingly. Linda epitomizes the vision of “inner wise-woman.”

Linda Joy’s Latest Venture is a new book: A Juicy, Joyful Life

A Juicy, Joyful Life

Recently hit bestseller on Barnes & Noble and #1 in Hot New Releases in two categories on Amazon!

“Meet an extraordinary group of women who have blessed and honored me by sharing their innate wisdom, insights and heart-felt stories in the pages of A Juicy, Joyful Life. Each woman shines her personal light in the pages of this inspirational anthology, and collectively guides you through the intimate trail of self-discovery,” Linda Joy explains. No doubt, Linda herself has led the way.

In her dedication to inspire women across the world Linda launched the “Mission to Inspire 100,000 Women” campaign and committed to giving away 100K subscriptions to Aspire.  Get yours today at www.SubscribetoAspire.com which comes with over 60 complimentary gifts.

Recently I had the good fortune of meeting the inspirational and highly motivated winner of the reality show, The Biggest Loser, Ali Vincent. At the recent Chat, Chew & Chocolate retreat, Ali shares her compelling story through her lens of fear, doubt and deep shame. Along her path she summons the courage and strength to challenge her greatest beliefs about herself. Ali pushes through her pain and loss and emerges not only the winner of The Biggest Loser, but fully embraces the empowered woman that she has become.

How did she find the motivation? How did she dare to stare her demons down? What lessons can we derive from her excruciating journey from self-loathing to self-love?

Somewhere along the line, Ali, once a champion synchronized swimmer, let her dreams of doing something great in life slip away. Her mother was okay with her own obesity and ‘being fat’ became normalized within the complexities of this mother-daughter relationship. Along with gradual and persistent weight gain, came the loss of her determination, hope and dreams.

Periodically Ali summoned the willpower to experiment with a new diet. “This time it will work.” Inevitably she end up sabotaging herself and giving up on her attempt to lose weight. For years the motivation for Ali was extrinsic. That is, the motivation came from the outside. She tried to lose weight to please others, to fit in and to feel more lovable.

When Ali began to align her motivation with her internal values and beliefs things began to change. Her journey to success began with the regular maintaining of her journal. She kept writing down her thoughts, feelings, and mood shifts to raise her level of self-awareness.

She started to tell herself throughout the day that, “I know that I was put here to make a difference in the world.” “Why can’t I be powerful enough to have balance, love and success?” “I can create my own destiny.” “I can do anything for a minute.” This led her to believe she could do anything for two minutes… Ali added “I had to fake it until I made it.” Eventually her journaling, self-talk and faking it wove its way into her unconscious mind and she began to authentically believe in herself.

Ali chose to step into her life and embarked upon an emotional and spiritual journey. She incorporated visualizations into everyday of her preparation for The Biggest Loser. Ali visualized feeling great about herself from the inside out. She pictured what she would wear when she won the contest. As she told her story she exuded strength and power mixed with moments of self-doubt and fear. “I kept choosing to know my fear. I kept choosing to own my fear. That was the way I emerged from my fear.”

Ali visualized her outfit as she graciously accepted the big win. She imagined the confetti falling all around her and her audience, as she held her arms high in triumph. Ali chose to push past her fears and step into her greatness.

What can you do to step into your greatness?

There is a powerful movement all around us. Can you feel it? Women are transforming, using their intuition and coming together to make a difference in their personal lives and in the world.

This weekend twenty women met at the Sanctuary Spa in Scottsdale, Arizona to look deeply inside themselves, learn some vital strategies, speak their truths and figure out how to access their beauty and wisdom.

Dena Patton, founder of Chat Chew & Chocolate, organized the retreat and invited speakers (Ali Vincent from the reality show The Biggest Loser; Martha Beck, writer for Oprah magazine; Randi Smith-Todorovski, martial arts and yoga instructor; and your own Dr.RKG, to teach, lead and participate in dynamic conversations, experiential exercises and workshops.

We practiced yoga and meditated, ate chocolate and fabulous health food, and, we shared our stories. We told stories of each of us bearing pain and loss. Each of us discovering how to move forward and be the extraordinary women we were meant to be.

Creating the balance of rest and play became one of the central themes, so that we are filled, rejuvenated and able to go back in an empowered way into the multiple roles we assume as women.

Martha Beck talked about Athena the Goddess of Wisdom as being a wonderful metaphor for women today. She explained that we are moving away from the patriarchal order of Zeus the God of War. We need to embrace our emotional and spiritual selves and tap into the collective wisdom of women.

Unlike men – who when stressed enter the “fight or flight response” – women generally have a very different instinctual response to stress called “tend and befriend.” We like to gather with our friends and family and share our experiences. Women by nature are intuitive beings and often ‘steer their course by starlight’.

We are preparing for a transformation of consciousness in an age of wisdom. According to Martha we are entering the new age of enlightenment, which will be championed by women.

Love and compassion alter the experience of pain and suffering. That same love and compassion will guide us through the darkness of war and the destruction of our planet.

To embrace our love and compassion, first we must heal ourselves through self-care and fulfilling relationships. Then when our hearts are full we will be able to overflow healing energy to all the other people in our lives.

Practice going through your day with self-love. Whenever your mind drifts away from that place, gently bring your awareness back to self-love and compassion. This is how we move into the awareness of Athena, the ability to feel our sense of joy, peace and humanity.

What do you need to do to better love yourself?

A little more about the Chat Chew & Chocolate retreat… As some of you already know, Dena Patton the founder of CC&C, an awards winning event company, has put together another inspirational weekend retreat at the Sanctuary Camelback Mountain Resort & Spa in Paradise Valley, Arizona. This retreat is specifically geared for busy women in need of rejuvenation or taking their life or business to the next level. 

The facilitators will include Martha Beck, (author and Oprah magazine contributor), Dena Patton (life coach, speaker and CEO of CC&C), Ali Vincent (entrepreneur and winner of the NBC Biggest Loser), Randi Smith-Todorowski (yoga and martial arts instructor) and me, DrRKG (psychologist, life coach, author and speaker). The collaboration and synergy of the facilitators already feels extraordinary. 

Dena described the retreat as an opportunity to: “Inspire your soul, expand your mind, empower your spirit and pamper your body. For leaders who want an intentional 3 day break from stress, life and DOING. Join us for three days of fun, inspiration, spa pampering, gourmet food and fabulous women from around the country.” 

At the moment there are four spots left. I encourage you to get yourself in gear if you can possibly attend. The next retreat will be offered in February, 2011. 

The retreat is an all-inclusive, which includes lodging, fabulous meals, spa treatment, yoga, and power-packed facilitation. It is perfect for mothers and daughters, coworkers, coaches and clients, girlfriends or just come by yourself. 

The group is limited to twenty participants so that the community is intimate and everyone has the opportunity to connect, gain clarity, support and leave feeling a sense of empowerment. 

This is a chance to make something magical happen in your life. I hope you can join us. 

What was the last magical experience that you had?

Cheryl possesses a smile that lights up a room. It’s an undeniable blend of mischief, optimism and a great sense of humor. She knows her share of pain and loss and yet she’s somehow figured out the key to maintaining a consistently positive mental attitude, with only the occasional lapses into turbulence.

A breast cancer survivor, Cheryl is the embodiment of the healing powers of friendship. The Brownie slogan “make new friends but keep the old, one is silver and the other gold” truly resonates with her. Friendships throughout Cheryl’s childhood as well as her high school and college years became an influential and important part of her world. Regardless of the personal and professional paths Cheryl pursued, her friends consistently remained vital to her sense of well-being.

Ups and Downs of Family Life

Cheryl as a teenager with family

Cheryl’s parents, Annette and Halle, met when they were youngsters and married when they were barely out of their teens. Cheryl was the oldest of their three children.

In high school, Cheryl’s father serendipitously bought a second-run movie theater where she and one of her brothers worked. It seemed like there was always some interesting new adventure going on in her family. Consequently, Cheryl had the unique opportunity of being exposed to a wide variety of budding businesses at a young age. Sadly for Cheryl and her siblings, her parents divorced after her younger brother left for college. Her father remarried but died soon after, suddenly at the age of 51, forever altering their worlds.

After graduating with honors from Wheaton College (Norton, MA), Cheryl married young and like her mother gave birth to three children. Along the way she freelanced for some of the local newspapers and volunteered in her children’s schools and at a variety of charitable organizations.

After 16 years, Cheryl’s marriage ended in divorce. She shared, “It is difficult to say exactly what happened, but regardless, we both made an effort to keep our private business from disrupting the family and especially our children.” Today they have a unique situation where, even though her former husband remarried, they still celebrate milestones and birthdays together. They share custody of their children and never got caught in a tug-of-war or any of the nastiness that often emerges in the divorce process.

Cheryl and Alan, New Year's Eve 2008, a week before diagnosis

Cheryl has had many chapters in her life – from a career woman in Manhattan to married suburban homemaker to divorced freelance writer, editor and publicist. She is devoted to her children, now 24, 21 and 16, her Portuguese Water Dog, Pepper, and her partner, Alan. Like many women juggling multiple roles, Cheryl put herself and her health last on the “to do” list.

Never in her wildest dreams did Cheryl think that she could compromise her health to such an extent that she would one day end up fighting for her life!

A Cancer Diagnosis and Journey to Wellness

In 2006 Cheryl had a mammogram at the Imaging Center in Boston. The radiologist spotted something in her right breast, did an ultrasound and then tried to aspirate it. Nothing came out. Cheryl said that, “If I had known then what I know now, I would have recognized that this was not a cyst, but a solid mass and most likely a tumor that needed to be biopsied immediately.” The radiologist  told her “to follow-up with her doctor.” Cheryl’s did not feel alarmed about getting to her doctor and her life felt chaotic at the time. In hindsight, Cheryl knows she needed to be more proactive and in charge of her own health care.

Late in 2006 she got a letter saying that the facility at One Brookline Place closed and she needed to collect the copies of her mammogram films or they would be put into storage. Cheryl neglected to pick up her films. Next Cheryl heard from her ob-gyn that he was leaving his practice and moving to California. In 2007, Cheryl was now without a gynecologist and any record of her history.

Finally in September 2007 she found a new doctor, and after 18 months, had her long overdue mammogram. She did not stay for the radiologist to read her film. About a week later she was asked to return for another round of films and to bring her last set of films with her. Cheryl now made her trek to the Boston Medical Center.

Spring 2008, Cheryl while undergoing treatment

By the time the cancer was diagnosed it had spread outside of the ducts and into her lymph nodes, local advanced (or Stage IIIb). Her surgeon feared that the cancer may have spread to an inoperable lymph node, but as Cheryl put it, “Only by the grace of God and sheer luck did I dodge that bullet. I never dreamed that I would be grateful to have  a Stage 3 breast cancer diagnosis, but the reality is that once the cancer spreads, the road to wellness is that much longer and tougher!”

She is extremely fortunate that the cancer did not metastasize to other parts of her body. Cheryl paid a price for her lax approach to her health care. She endured nearly a year of grueling treatment and surgeries to reach a stage where there was “no evidence of cancer.”

Cheryl continues to be on a medication regimen that produces a wide range of side effects and in January 2010, she underwent a bilaterial DIEP flap reconstructive surgery.  She tries very hard not to let herself worry about recurrence, although the thought persists in the back of her mind. Cheryl remains committed to practicing her affirmations and self-hypnosis exercises on a daily basis.

Friends Helped Cheryl’s Healing Process

Throughout her cancer experience and beyond, Cheryl has leaned on her circle of wonderful, supportive, devoted friends. “I like to think that I am a very good friend to have and that I give a great deal to those I care about. So when I was diagnosed with cancer in January 2008, you might say it was karma that all of that giving was returned to me in spades.”

At first it was difficult for Cheryl to be the recipient and not the giver, but as she continued on her difficult journey she learned one of the most important lessons about healing. “You have to put yourself at the top of the list during this critical time. Everyone needs to feel needed and I think it was helpful to people who were closest to me to be able to ‘do’ something and not feel so helpless.” Cheryl feels fortunate that she is the type of person able to reach out and ask for help when she needs it. “I think it’s because I don’t feel as though I’m imposing – I feel as though I’m offering an opportunity to help me and then I will return the favor. It’s a give-and-take, which most friendships are.”

Cheryl and friends, July 2008 before surgery

Everyone who knows Cheryl has heard her say, “No one survives cancer (or any illness or trauma) alone. It is a team effort – you need the support of family and friends. You need to gather a good medical team, one that you trust and feel comfortable and confident in. You need to have faith, hope and trust in people whom you have never even met.”

One of Cheryl’s most cherished memories is after she came home from her mastectomy; she noticed her front yard looked rather neglected. She loves gardening and had begun a project in her front yard before her surgery. A week after her return home, a group of her friends came over unsolicited and completed the job.  “Every time I stood up to do something they all shouted, ‘Sit down, Cheryl!’” She has no doubt in her mind that part of the reason she had such a great outcome from her cancer diagnosis was due to the love and care she received from so many loving friends.

Cheryl tries to express her gratitude whenever possible. “Whenever I hear of someone being diagnosed with breast cancer now, I reach out and help them understand and get through this difficult time. Before this disease touched me, I never knew what to say or do. Now I feel like I can make a significant difference in the lives of others. It feels like it has become part of my mission in life.” Cheryl occasionally experiences some dark days, but she does what she can to maintain a positive outlook and the belief that she will survive and flourish.

Healing Herself and Making a Difference

Cheryl with Maxine and Janet, 2007

Now she is trying to get to year five when she jumps into a much better statistical survival pool. For now, Cheryl is very proud of her role as a breast cancer survivor and advocate for good health for women. “That is one reason why I have stayed very involved at the Virginia Thurston Healing Garden, which is an extraordinary place for women undergoing cancer treatment. Besides serving on a committee for a fundraiser in 2009, I took part in their annual walk to raise money last October. I raised the most funds as a single walker. This year I hope to put together a team to walk there, and at the Making Strides event on the Esplanade.”

Cheryl currently gives inspirational talks at special events for AstraZeneca, including the 2009 Making Strides Against Breast Cancer.  “It was one of the thrills of my life the first time I stood before 4,000 people and told my story.” She also participated in two science days for AstraZeneca, once with her oncologist, and once with one of her heroes in the breast cancer wars, Jacqueline Pimentel. Jacqueline lost her battle with cancer but Cheryl learned a great deal from her about maintaining a loving spirit and never succumbing to the disease. “Her expression NGUNGI! never give up, never give in, has been a rallying cry for many of us survivors.”

Cheryl with close friends Melanie and Linda

Friends and family encouraged Cheryl to endure her cancer fight, and their relentless support gives her the strength to carry on. “So if anyone asks me, do I think friendship is a key component to healing? The answer is unequivocally, yes!”

Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “’To have a friend you have to be a friend.” That seems to be Cheryl’s motto for life.

Three days post hip replacement surgery a small team with a large ambulance transported me to a rehabilitation facility. While there, I began to heal from the invasive procedure and relearn the act of walking.

Handfuls of medications came periodically throughout the day. One hour before physical therapy, pain medication was generously doled out so that I could tolerate the pain from the simplest of leg and hip movements.

The days spent there seemed to meld together. Each day was about taking care of basic bodily functions: washing, changing johnnies, taking packs of medications, learning and relearning the crucial hip precautions, physical therapy that left me reeling and baby steps with the walker.

My concentration faded into a mere blur. People magazine seemed difficult to follow. My fantasy before the surgery was to read and write as I recovered from the ordeal. For the first couple of weeks, the written word seemed like nothing more than hieroglyphics.

During the long nights at rehab, I laid on my back, unable to sleep or modify my position. My body temperature could not properly adjust and sporadically throughout each night I found myself drenched in sweat and shivering uncontrollably.

I could barely organize my thoughts, but managed to press the “help” button. As if by magic, a woman instantly came to my bedside and whispered, “How can I help?” “What’s wrong?” Through chattering teeth I told her I was freezing cold and dripping in sweat. “Everything is wet,” I said. “I just need to get dry and warm.”

She responded calmly, “You’re okay darling. This is normal. I’ll get you all set up. Just relax. Just breathe. You’ll be better than new in just a few minutes.” She carefully put my limp body into her arms and moved me to the chair next to my bed with guardrails. Her strength made me feel safe.

First, she slowly took off my wet johnny and replaced it with one that was deliciously warm and soft. My heart rate slowed down and my respiration began to smooth out. Next, she changed the bedding one layer at a time. She attentively slipped me back into bed and told me to relax my body for now I would be able to drift off to sleep. And so I did…

About an hour later I again found myself in a cold sweat, feeling scared and out of control yet again. I pressed the button and back she came, with the same patience and compassion as the first time. We went through the cycle repeatedly. Never once was there a delayed reaction to my call for help or a hint of annoyance in her demeanor, even though my bedding and night clothes needed to be changed night after night, a minimum of five times.

The surgeon called my condition “thermo-disregulation”, which sometimes arises as a side effect of a major surgery. I dubbed the nurses and nurses’ aids “the angels of the night.” They consistently came to my rescue and in a matter of minutes, made everything better so I could feel safe again.

These women had beautiful hearts and gentle souls. Many of them looked as though they had been through their own life traumas, but each time they came I felt like there was some kind of divine intervention.

I feel so humbled and grateful in a bizarre sort of way for this lesson in kindness and humanity. Thank you to my “angels of the night”.

Who are you grateful for in your life?

Motivation moves us forward. Motivation shows up everywhere in our lives – from the execution of mundane tasks to inspired and visionary actions. Every one of us is driven by a unique set of life circumstances and genetics that propels us in one way or another.

Some women are motivated most of the time whereas others need to find ways to keep energized and inspired. The reason for this has to do with intrinsic versus extrinsic motivation, one of the keys to understanding motivation.

Intrinsic Versus Extrinsic Motivation

Intrinsic motivation is when we are operating from an internal driving force. For example, I am writing this article because writing and educating others rewards me at a core level. Educating and inspiring others taps into two core values of mine which brings me a sense of joy and personal satisfaction. Other core values might be the pleasure one derives from learning, experiencing adventures, unearthing the truth, assuming a leadership role, or care-taking.

Extrinsic motivation is externally driven. For example, I am writing this article because doing so will keep my blog fresh and growing, with new readers and subscribers. This form of motivation does not necessarily tune into my inner world, instead it is fueled by outside rewards.

The most powerful way of staying motivated is by digging deep and uncovering your strongest interests. Staying true to your core values is at the heart of remaining motivated regardless of whether you are receiving external rewards or not.

Eight Secrets to Enhanced Motivation

1. Pay attention to your core values. Find ways to integrate the values that give you your greatest sense of meaning into your personal or professional life. That’s a sure fire way to remain motivated and inspired.
2. Reframe the words “I have to…” with “I choose to…” Although it seems semantical, ‘choosing to do something’ as opposed to ‘having to do something’ shifts your consciousness around that activity or job. Choosing to do whatever you do, empowers you and allows you to take charge of your own experiences.
3. Grow your network. Talking with trusted friends, family members, colleagues and like-minded souls can help keep you stay focused and build momentum. It also might be good to team up with someone that has complementary abilities. Mutual support often adds great value and energy to projects.
4. Set goals. Setting long and short term goals gives you focus a charted course to follow. Write down your goals to connect you further with your plan. Include “mini goals” so that you experience small accomplishments along the way. This helps keep you on track for the “grand goals.”
5. “Just do it.” Sometimes taking action precedes the motivation. For example, you might not want to take your exercise class on a particular day, but once you get there and find your groove, the motivation and internal reward jump starts.
6. Build the basics into your daily routine. Structuring the time to take care of your bodily needs such as eating, sleeping, working out helps keep you vital and energized for the tasks at hand.
7. Capitalize on your strengths. Work with your greatest skill set. The one that is mostly likely to generate the feeling of ‘flow’ or ‘being in the zone.’ Delegate the stuff that brings you down when possible, so that you remain unencumbered to do what you do best.
8. Celebrate your successes. Reward yourself for your efforts and accomplishments. Chances are no one else will! It does not need to be a major vacation or an expensive something. It can be as simple as lunch with a friend, going to a movie, getting a massage, crawling into bed early with a great book.

Motivation is about connecting with core values and finding balance. When we are taking care of ourselves and living authentically, it is much easier to feel inspired.

What motivates YOU?

Judy Quint exercises the way most women breathe. It is an essential component of her life. So far she has become a certified Zumba® instructor, an attorney specializing in real estate transactions, and a devoted daughter, wife, mother and friend. She has run the Boston Marathon and beaten a rare disease into submission. One gets the feeling there isn’t anything Judy Quint cannot do once she puts her mind to it. She exudes enthusiasm, passion and a lovely, gentle energy.

“Only child” in a family of four children

Shyrlie and Sam Shriberg with baby Judy, August 1959

Judy came from an interesting family structure. Her mother was 42 and her father 52 when they had Judy, 15 years following the birth of their three sons. Judy’s mother went to her oldest brother’s college graduation when she was pregnant with her baby girl. In essence, she was like an “only child” in a family with four children.

While growing up in Newton, Massachusetts Judy’s father chronically battled a heart condition and diabetes. His legs needed to be amputated when Judy turned 12, shortly before her bat mitzvah. She spent countless hours helping him to learn how to walk with prosthetic legs and pushing him in his wheelchair.

Judy was 16 when her father succumbed to his compromised health issues. Rather than focusing on the loss of her dad, Judy expressed the gratitude she felt for having spent so much quality time with him those last years.

The next 30 years Judy devoted to caring for her mother as she lived locally and her brothers lived across the country. During that time she also raised her own family. Four years ago Judy’s mother died. Judy cherished their relationship and supported her in every way possible to the end.

Pursuing a Career in Law

Judy pursued her personal and professional life as she cared for her aging mother. She graduated from Ithaca College with a sociology major. Judy originally wanted to go to law school to specialize in health law. “I wanted to help women who were being subjected to unwanted hysterectomies by their doctors as an easy solution to their medical problems and trying to lower the population. I wanted to work primarily with Hispanic women as I had a Spanish minor in college and wanted to combine that skill with serving women through the practice of law.”

“When I look back on this early career decision I see that my interest in health was there from the beginning.” After Judy graduated from New England School of Law, her first job was in a law firm that specialized in real estate law and thus began her career. Choosing this job took Judy away from her intended path, but got her on track for going out on her own within a few years. She became her own boss, allowing Judy to make her own schedule so she could care for her mother and later her children.

Marriage, Family and a Rare Diagnosis

Judy got married at the age of 22 following her first year of law school. After experiencing three years of infertility treatment and a miscarriage, Judy at last gave birth to her daughter and thereafter had two more healthy children without medical assistance.

She raised her kids, developed her career as a lawyer and visited her mother everyday in her assisted living home. Now two of her children have been “launched” and are off at college. After her son graduates from high school, Judy and her husband will officially be empty nesters.

Quint Family

Several years ago Judy was diagnosed with a rare autoimmune disease called Pemphigus Vulgaris. Even the name sounds unpleasant. She endured two years of experimental treatment after suffering painful mouth and throat sores that prevented her from eating solid foods for those two years. Judy braved a difficult treatment protocol and is now in remission. She prays that she never experiences a flare up of the painful disease, as there is no known cure.

Judy shared that, “Going through the treatment is similar to what cancer patients do when they receive chemo. The disease made me miserable, but also taught me to live each day fully. I never waste any time putting things off for the future. I want to take it all in now and not sweat the small stuff.” She looked me in the eyes and said, “Life is such a precious gift and we need to embrace it.”

Judy said that she “…always regretted that I did not do what I truly wanted to do in law, which was health care law. But I persevered knowing that someday I would do what I really enjoy and what would make a difference to others.”

Exercise and Health

Judy exercises for her physical and psychological well being. She explained that her genetic predisposition to heart disease, diabetes and high blood pressure made it essential for her to keep a healthy weight and strong body. Although she hated gym class as a young girl, Judy loved the camaraderie of being on a team, which inspired her to improve her skills and make the volleyball team.

During college and law school she sporadically ran, played tennis and worked out, which helped her manage stress and stay in reasonably good shape. Judy realized that she felt more energetic and productive after doing some cardiovascular activity for about an hour 3-4 times weekly. “I kept my weight in check and exercised throughout my 3 pregnancies.”

Judy confesses she “… got hooked. I realized that exercise was essential to my physical and mental well being. I found the magic pill to manage my stress and that was working out.”

Judy Quint and Jamie Gossels cross the Boston Marathon finish line in 1999

Shortly before her fortieth birthday Judy began running more consistently. One day she approached one of her friends and together they decided to run the Boston Marathon. They also combined this goal with raising money for the Leukemia Society. Judy and Jamie diligently prepared for this most challenging event laughing, crying and sharing along the way.

“My body was not made for running long distance. I had big hips, a big tush and extra body fat. I pushed myself and spent time in physical therapy helping me work through pain issues. But I had a goal and I was determined to reach it.

Having my family, including my husband, three kids, youngest brother and his family and especially my mom watching me cross that finish line was my greatest triumph. I realized at that moment I could do absolutely anything if I put my mind to it.”

Judy Quint's bulls-eye shot first time she tried, with son Michael in 2003

Zumba® with Judy

Three years ago Judy took a Zumba® class on a whim with a friend. Although she could not easily learn the combinations, she felt an immediate attraction for this dynamic and effective fitness system that incorporates a fusion of Latin and international music.

“I loved participating in Zumba® classes because I needed to focus on the movement and beat and could not be thinking of my ‘to do’ list. Zumba® class is like taking a mini vacation. It is a time to express myself and enjoy the movements of my body. The heavy sweating is the icing on the cake!”

In a matter of months she was again ‘hooked’ and went on to earn her certification as a Zumba® instructor shortly before her 49th birthday. “I was not intimidated by all the skinny twenty year olds taking the class because I knew I would find my own niche. I felt passion and a calling to make something of this.”

Judy Quint teaches a Zumba® class

Once Judy began teaching, her infectious enthusiasm for Zumba® drew women into her classes. The upbeat music, great moves, fun connections and overall great workout, keeps them coming. She says her students seem more radiant, happy and energized after Zumba® class. The women rock out together and before and after class they share their stories.

Judy feels blessed to finally be able to do what makes her truly happy. She still handles real estate closings in between teaching her classes. “I appreciate the law work. It keeps my mind focused. But I’m so much happier now knowing that my Zumba® classes are awaiting me.”

Volunteering and other passions

Judy’s other passions include spending time with her family, the Red Sox, Bruce Springsteen concerts, travel, biking, the beach, reading, and of course dancing.

In addition Judy volunteers in various organizations such as breast cancer and Leukemia research, World ORT (an organization to educate people to become self-sufficient), President of her Wayland synagogue, and Second Step (organization helping victims of domestic violence). She has also walked in the Avon 2-Day event to raise money for breast cancer research.

Judy Quint and friend finish the Avon 2-day walk

Twenty-five years after Judy graduated law school and began her career, she went full circle back to her interest in health care. Caring for her own body and the physical and psychological well-being of her students through Zumba® brings Judy in touch with her deepest passion.

When asked if she had a favorite saying Judy ran the question by some girlfriends that she faithfully walks with every Sunday. “They said I always say ‘Go for it’ – no matter what they are trying to do with their lives. Apparently I always tell them to stop thinking about it and just go for it. I encourage them each week to cross something new off their ‘to do’ list and then report back to me what they have done.” Judy naturally sees beyond the usual limits for herself as well as her students and friends. She makes it her life work to support and challenge others to realize their unlimited potential.

Debbie Phillips evokes a sense of calm, kindness and strength all at once. When asked about her interests and passions, Debbie immediately shares “I love helping people express their talent in the world and support them in growing into their potential.”

Debbie has been through numerous metamorphoses in her personal and professional life. One career path created an opening for the next.

Lessons learned growing up in a large family in Ohio

Debbie grew up in Ohio with her four siblings. Her father was an accountant by training and a salesman by trade. Although her mother wanted desperately to become a nurse, Debbie’s grandfather was unwilling to pay the bill. Instead Debbie’s mother became an extraordinary homemaker – emanating love, creativity and the capacity to be fully present with her children despite barely making ends meet.

“I truly don’t know how she did it with five little kids and so little support. When times got tough, she jumped in and went to work in factories. Plus, in the early years we moved often… By the time I was in the sixth grade, I had attended six schools. I was “the new girl” every single year from first to sixth grade. My mother made it seem like an adventure and told me I was lucky to get to be the new girl and meet so many new people all the time! ”

Debbie Phillips as a child with her family in Ohio

Debbie’s mother found the positive in whatever life dealt. She felt grateful for her beautiful, healthy family and somehow knew that everything else would fall into place. Debbie confided that growing up she often felt embarrassed by her meager surroundings and vowed that when she grew up, her family would never have to struggle financially.

Debbie, like her mother, embodies an infectious sense of optimism and gratitude. Leaving for college, Debbie felt poised to create the life she dreamed of. She attended Ohio State University and majored in journalism.

Her passion for the media began when she was fifteen, working for the local radio station. Two years later Debbie moved into the world of journalism and photography, working initially for the local newspaper and eventually becoming a reporter for the Columbus Citizen-Journal.

A journalism career turns into a political windfall

Her journalism career quickly evolved into working on the presidential campaign of U.S. Senator (former astronaut) John Glenn. After Senator Glenn dropped out of the race, Debbie became press secretary to Ohio Governor Richard F. Celeste.

Debbie Phillips as a young journalist

In that position, Debbie traveled the world meeting strategists, business and political leaders. “I worked extremely hard and consider that I earned a ‘PhD’ in life and work by the time I finished.” After spending time in politics and government, she attended the Kennedy School at Harvard University where she earned her masters degree in public administration.

Along the way Debbie met her first husband, Brad, and became deeply connected to the unconditional love of his parents. Debbie developed a very deep and loving bond with Brad’s mother, Libby. After the death of Brad’s parents, Debbie’s marriage broke down. After 14 years of marriage, Brad and Debbie sadly decided to divorce.

Debbie nevertheless continued to follow her dream. Not long after her painful divorce, she became a life and executive coach. The coaching profession was then in its infancy stages and few people even knew that such a career existed. Debbie said that she barely knew what it was all about, but something caught her attention. She learned quickly and blossomed in this field.

Coaching career ignites into Women on Fire movement

During her coaching career, Debbie created Vision Day, a strategic planning day for realizing one’s goals. She expanded the business and outreach of Vision Day after meeting her future husband and fellow executive coach, Rob Berkley.

Today Debbie is the mastermind of the “Women on Fire” organization, which is dedicated to connecting remarkable women to each other, to increase their options and possibilities for success. Now there are Women on Fire Tea Parties in several states. She still occasionally leads Vision Days but the bulk of her time is spent leading and expanding Women On Fire from her home-base of Martha’s Vineyard.

Debbie Phillips at a Women on Fire Tea Party in NYC

One of Debbie’s own dreams came true with the publication of the book “Women on Fire: 20 Inspiring Women Share Their Life Secrets (and Save You Years of Struggle!). Losing Brad’s mother is the subject of Debbie’s chapter in her book. As Debbie describes it, “real women telling their real-life stories and struggles and how they made it through their obstacles and challenges.”

Melissa McClain is one of Debbie’s “Women on Fire.” By day Melissa is a crisis management professional and has worked with organizations around the world to create industry leading survivor and family assistance programs and respond to mass casualty incidents.

Melissa McClain with her camera

While she finds her work rewarding, Melissa’s passion reveals itself through her extraordinary photography. After attending a group Vision Day and several Women on Fire tea parties, Melissa has created new goals and dreams for her photography and designs. She is now fully connected to her photography passion and recently had her first solo exhibit in Brooklyn, New York.

Debbie also worked with Jacqueline Pimentel, an art lover and real estate broker living on Martha’s Vineyard. Jacqueline achieved her long held dream of earning her bachelor’s degree in art history from Harvard University with Debbie’s inspiration. Jacqueline recently lost her battle with cancer and throughout that painful process Debbie was by her side encouraging her to live her last days fully.

The theme of gratitude resonated with Debbie. “I am grateful that in the formative stages of my life and career I had people who really cared and helped me along. I’m grateful for having close friends and a best friend for nearly 30 years. I’m grateful for a second chance at marriage and thank my incredible husband Rob Berkley for that.”

Debbie Phillips and her husband, Rob Berkley

Today Debbie and Rob collaborate on creating their own visions for their lives and the lives of others. Debbie’s feeling of gratitude for the love and work in her life shines through even on the most challenging of days. Debbie truly represents the essence of a “Woman on Fire” and says “I have always been filled with such gratitude to do the work I love so very much!”

Additional Gratitude Statements by Debbie Phillips

• “I am grateful every single, solitary day – for the contrasts that have made me appreciate my life. I’ve been shaped by being poor and being wealthy and now I am somewhere in between!
• “I am grateful my parents were warm and loving to me. Grateful that they lived until I was a fully grown woman. (My mother is still living, 75 and running her own business still!)
• “Grateful my parents always talked about the possibilities and impressed how important education was and that I would go to college.
• “Grateful my parents story had a successful ending…they did what they wanted in eventually starting their own bulk-mailing company in Huntsville, AL and were successful after many years of struggle in their younger years.
• “I am grateful during my darkest times of grief and despair, I went to therapy and allowed myself to break open. From it my spiritual life emerged. My precious goddaughter Julia was born during this time and I call her “the tender shoot that arrived in my darkest winter.”
• “I am grateful to live in two of the most beautiful places in the United States – Martha’s Vineyard and Naples, FL and have a partner who supports my dreams.”