Here is an abbreviated example of a meditation that I often teach. I’ll begin with a brief relaxation exercise and then move right into the actual meditation. Enjoy!

~Relax your eyes closed, allowing them to roll slightly upward without straining them in any way.

~Relax your face, especially the muscles around the eyes. Part your lips slightly and relax your jaws. Your face is serene and expressionless.

~Relax your shoulders, neck and back – just let the muscles of your upper body go limp.

~Relax your arms and hands.

~Allow the full weight of your body to relax, so that you are fully supported by the chair and are sitting effortlessly.

~Your feet are relaxed and fully supported by the floor. Feel the contact that your feet are making with the floor.

~Now observe the rise and fall of each breath as you breathe “in” and breathe “out.”

~Repeat the word “in” as you breathe in and “out” as you breathe out.

~Breathing in and out. Breathing in and out.

~When your mind wanders, bring your attention back to the breath with a gentle and loving attitude.

~Breathing in and out – in and out.

~Always bringing your attention back to the breath.

~Watching the rise and fall of every breath.

~When sounds or distractions enter your consciousness, use them as cues to help you go deeper as you focus on breathing in and out.

~Always bring your attention back to the breath.

~Breathing in and out…..

~Good. When you are ready, begin visualizing yourself in the room at this moment and gradually begin opening your eyes. Take your time as you reenter.

~Now just take note of how you are feeling.

When you are practicing this on your own, the meditation is much simpler than what we just did. All you need to do is sit for a designated time (5, 10, or 15 minutes) and watch the rise and fall of your breath, gently bringing your attention back to the breath whenever you get distracted. That is all meditation really is.

Meditation is easy to learn…the challenge is in the follow through and incorporating the practice into your everyday life.

I suggest that you build time into you schedule once or twice daily, even if only for five minutes at a time.

The best times to practice meditation is first thing in the morning or late in the afternoon.

Remember whatever you get from a meditation is more than likely going to enhance the quality of your everyday life.

Wishing you much success with your practice!

If you have any questions regarding your meditation practice please feel free to contact me here.

Most of us live in a perpetual state of doing, doing, doing: creating lists, striving, working hard, reaching for goals, running on empty. Cultivating the capacity for stillness in the midst of your busy day can yield enormous benefits. The ability to be still… can nourish and sustain the mind and body in ways that might seem hard to fathom.  These moments are like micro-vacations, providing relief from the stress of our every day lives. They can allow us to reconnect with a deeper part of ourselves. These moments can also provide reframes and mood alterations. The unconscious mind can reveal itself and be made conscious. Intuition becomes more accessible.

Setting aside several minutes a day for the practice of meditation will enhance your ability to be still and calm.

What are some of the benefits of meditation?

The regular practice of meditation can:

• Decrease anxiety, depression and chronic pain
• Improve concentration
• Develop more optimism, insight and resilience
• Boost the immune system
• Lower heart rate, blood pressure, muscle tension
• Enhance pre and post-surgical outcomes
• Improve fertility
• Reduce symptoms associated with asthma, seasonal affective disorder and disruptive sleep

How to meditate or initiate a relaxation response:

Get into a comfortable sitting position (if sitting is difficult, then lie on a comfortable surface).

Find a quiet environment especially in the early stages of learning meditation.

Repeat a sound, word or phrase over and over.

For the purposes of this meditation, I recommend repeating the word “in” to yourself as you breathe in and “out” to yourself as you breathe out.You are breathing in and out as you pay attention to the rise and fall of each breath. I particularly like this form of meditation because mindful breathing is the key to all relaxation and following the rise and fall of every breath keeps you focused on the physical action that initiates authentic relaxation. At the same time you are developing the ability to “be” in the present moment–you and your breath.

Most importantly you want to have a nonjudgmental attitude. Remember every time you meditate something of value happens even if it hard to identify. Eventually you will begin to notice the subtle and perhaps not so subtle changes that occur as you meditate. The benefits of this practice are cumulative and ultimately quite powerful.

When you become distracted, which more than likely will happen, gently bring your attention back to the breath – the rise and fall of each breath.

Ideally practice for about 15-20 minutes twice daily. If that seems like too long or difficult, just begin by sitting for five minutes once a day. Even 5 minutes of sitting has its benefits and eases you into the process of meditation.

With the meditation I am describing, you do not need any props, such as music, a mantra, a candle or for that matter this or any CD. The goal is to internalize this learning and be able to take it with where ever you go – not needing anything but you and your willingness to set aside the time and sit.

Remember that moments of stillness in and of themselves can be deeply rewarding and beneficial.

What have you observed about yourself during moments of stillness?

The short conversation on the phone left my husband, Martin with a look of shock. “What was that about?” I asked. Martin stood in silence, took some forced deep breaths and softly spoke. “There’s been an accident. A terrible accident.” As it turned out, one of my son, Max’s dear childhood friend was killed in a car crash hours before. He left a party in the early morning hours feeling it would be safe to drive. He got into his car, still slightly intoxicated from the night before neglecting to put on his seat beat. He drove off and almost immediately crashed into a tree.  He wanted to get home; it was such a short distance. This was a great kid who made a terrible decision.

My son was on his way to a concert in Boston, ready to savor his last night in town and then finish up the packing in the morning. Martin called him to tell him of the tragedy so he didn’t read it on facebook or hear it on the news or from a friend. Somehow we thought perhaps we could soften the blow from the sickening news. He began to wail over the phone. He uttered a sound I had never heard come from him before. I could hear the ghoulish cries even as I stood several feet away from the phone.

How could this be? They were such great buddies. So many childhood memories shared. Max came home, locked himself in his room and sobbed. One by one Amy, Martin and I offered to talk to him or just be with him. “I need to figure this out alone. I need to think. I need…” His cries could be heard throughout the house. Amy left to walk the dog, just so she could shield herself at least temporarily from Max’s anguish.

My heart aches for the family that suffered the greatest loss of all. Their lives forevermore changed and broken. My heart aches for the young man with such promise that will never see age twenty. My heart aches for my son who lost his dear boyhood friend along with his innocence. No one is impervious. Yes, we need to train our children to be ever vigilant in making good choices and decisions. Even then we cannot save them from senseless catastrophe.

Last night I found myself murmuring prayers for the unspeakable loss of this family and for the protection of my own children.

How do you best protect your children from catastrophe?

Today I went to the hospital because the visiting nurse alarmed me to the fact that a small infection formed at the peak corner of my new hip replacement scar. “No time to waste. You never know how fast an infection can travel. This requires urgent care.” She made a succession of anxiety riddled phone calls to my orthopedic surgeon, the surgeons’ two assistants, the on-call resident and finally my primary care physician. She was determined to resolve the infection in question swiftly.

At first, I felt safe with her determination to find an immediate solution to the problem. Then, as we waited for the return phone calls and she continued to apprise me of the meaning of a spread infection I gradually began to panic. Fortunately, my primary care physician agreed to see me immediately. My husband booked it on his way home from work and then off to the office we went.

“This is indeed an infection.” I was told. “But, not the sort that people with a hip replacement fear. See your surgeon first thing in the morning which he has already agreed to and we will sort this out. Another night of some pain, but nothing scary.” I remembered to breathe again and slowly began to feel contained within my own skin.

The next morning my daughter, my beautiful and compassionate day nurse for the next week or two, drove me to my appointment with the surgeon. He reigns over the orthopedic department at one of Boston’s finest hospitals, and was the mastermind behind the delicate placement of the titanium hip into the depths of my body.

At the information desk, I was told to take the elevator one flight down and go straight down the corridor to his office. My daughter drops me off because the valet parking is temporarily full. “I can manage getting to the doctor’s office,” I told Amy.  “Just meet me after you’ve given the car to the valet.”

Hobbling inside with my chrome walker, I felt confident that I could get myself to my doctor’s office without any difficulty. I blew a kiss and one step at a time, off I went. No problem getting to the elevator; a few steps more than anticipated, but I felt strong and able. The elevator doors opened, I got out and there it was “ambulatory care.”

The only problem was that to get to the actual floor where I would find my doctor’s office, I needed to descend about fifteen steep steps and no walker was getting down these steps. I asked a physician getting off the next elevator run, “How do I get to ambulatory care?” He looked at me quizzically and said, “It’s right down these steps.” As he we dashing off I said, “But I have this walker.” I stood in amazement.

Then I summoned the courage to let out a loud “excuse me…” and got the attention of a staff member down that long flight of stairs. “How do I get down?” He said, “It’s easy. Go back on the elevator to the second floor. Go down and across the corridor and take the south elevator to this floor. It’s over there.” He pointed at the place I should end up once I followed all of his other instructions.

I thanked him and in a moment of weakness, regression and self-pity I felt the warm tears streaming down my face. It just felt like there was too much to do when I could hardly walk even with the aid of the walker.

Within a minute or two I regained my composure and reminded myself that I could do this and besides, Amy would be there to laugh and cry about the injustice of those ill-placed steps and the insensitive doctor who couldn’t help a person with a walker. That is just what happened.

My doctor prescribed antibiotics and mitigated my fears imposed by the visiting nurse. After a grim 24 hours, my sense of hope and optimism again returned.

When have you felt helpless?

Abdominal breathing, meditation, mindful walking, constructive rest and building friendships are some of my favorite behavioral strategies for balance and happiness. Click on any of the titles listed at the bottom of this page and learn how to create these practices for yourself.

Abdominal breathing is useful anytime and can be practiced in a concentrated way (5-10 minutes once or twice daily) or whenever it comes to mind. The kind of deep breathing always helps with initiating a feeling of relaxation and a greater capacity to be in the present moment.

Meditation is an extremely effective way to develop a sense of calm, clarity and creativity. There are also a wide range of psychological and physical benefits that result from the regular practice of meditation.

Mindful walking is an alternative meditation practice for those that find the sitting  difficult. It provides almost all of the same benefits physically an psychologically as the sitting meditation. Both techniques can be used interchangeably.

Constructive rest is an antigravity position that is great for practicing the abdominal breathing. In this position diaphragmatic breathing comes easily. You can also easily observe the ‘rise’ and ‘fall’ of the low belly as you breathe.

Building friendships and enhancing intimacy in relationships is vital to our sense of well-being and self-esteem. It’s also been shown repeatedly in the research that having good relationships helps us to live healthier, longer and happier lives. Improving communication skills and making the conscious decision to improve connections with others is guaranteed to have a significant impact on the quality of your life.

Physical Activity meaning any activity that requires physical effort sustained for 10 minutes or more, to improve strength, flexibility and endurance for overall health and fitness.

1. Abdominal Breathing
2. Building Friendships
3. Constructive Rest
4. Meditation
5. Mindful Walking
6. Enhancing Intimacy in Relationships
7. Physical Activity
   

Create the Practice of Constructive Rest:

1. The constructive rest position is ideal for learning abdominal breathing, for easing you into sleep, for reducing anxiety or pain, and for general relaxation.
2. Lie down on a flat surface with your neck supported with a small pillow or cushion. Bend your knees and support them with a larger pillow or cushion, so that your body is in a gentle pelvic tilt.
3. Place both hands on your low belly (below the navel) and feel the natural rhythm of the rise and fall of each breath.
4. The aim is to create a pattern of long, slow, deep, even, breaths.
5. Make sure the exhalation is also long, slow, deep, even and complete. The belly and chest should ideally feel quite empty, but without forcing the air out.
6. Practice once or twice daily whenever a calming effect is desired.

Practice 2 x daily for 5–10 minutes

Practice Abdominal Breathing:

1. Relax the shoulders and lift up in the chest bone.
2. Breathe into the low belly, below the navel.
3. When you breathe in, the belly expands and goes out.
4. When you breathe out, the belly empties and goes inwards.
5. Breathe in a long, slow, deep, full, even breath.
6. Breathe out a long, slow, complete exhalation.
7. Empty out the belly and lungs. The relaxation occurs on the exhalation.
8. Repeat this cycle for a few minutes in the morning and evening.
9. Abdominal breathing cannot be overdone.
10. Practice in a concentrated way at least twice a day and whenever it comes to mind.

Practice several times daily